Not sure how to express how I feel, it's like being hit ten times by a truck. Have no idea why! I feel like everybody in this world just HATES me! feels like everyone is talking behind my back. I hate that feeling! Hate IT!!! I don't know why, is the reward for being nice, is being back stabbed and talked about?! WTF is wrong with this world.
I just want to hide..want to run away! Really miss home, but even when i go home, i know there's no one else anywhere that would understand what I'm feeling right now. By cutting myself, I feel better, by crying like nobody's business, I'll feel much better.
I was once told that, in this world, no matter how many people you're with or whether or not you're in a crowd, YOU are always ALONE. Because nobody else can hear your thoughts, truly understand your feelings and be there to catch you while you fall. I find it utterly true, because this is how i feel right now....ALONE!
Can't wait...can't wait to just fall asleep and never wake up again. Can't wait until this world just SHUT UP! Just want to be myself, but to afraid too. Afraid of what people might think, what people might judge, afraid of losing myself..does it make sense? Whatever, cause nothing make sense to me right now..
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